I have been feeling stressed and  worried at work over the past few months. The feeling of hopelessness, mainly on work issues.. the feeling that the balls I am jugging now will fall very soon.

Then people tell me, well I have to practice resilience, this is where you learn to bounce back after every setback. They keep saying, the bad time will pass.. and I found this quote very interesting.. 

The only thing I can remember from all the resilience classes is to look at things from a positive aspects and have some time out once in a while. 

In other words, you got to roll with the punches. 

Reflection – Update Nov 2020

A few months after the post was written, I left that role (as a Functional Safety Manager) and moved back to the team that I had built my career as a Platform Software Execution Lead (a fancy name for a software program manager). I was a functional safety manager for a bit more than a year. I had high hopes for functional safety, being impressed by the work that goes into making systems reliable through my MSc course. When the company acquired a small functional safety consulting firm that came with a very prolific fellow, I had to get into the organization (which I did).

Looking at the picture of the quote, I can recall the troubled feeling at that time. I was working longer hours than ever, with project management team for a new product that you cannot reason with. They are set with what they need and have to deliver hook or by crook. At the same time, the new team is still developing the functional safety lifecycle that we need to execute against.

It is like building a spaceship while flying to the moon

There is a sense of fear that something is going to break soon. Already every day, we are getting bombarded asking for status update and squeezed between what’s needed to be done and the pressure to complete from program management.

I would end up working LONGER hours in the new role, the pressure from program management team is the same if not worse. But I somehow managed it better the in the new role. I was calmer, can think clearly and more engaging with the team. I later learned that this is what is called my Judgement. In functional safety, it’s new to everyone and we are trying to figure out our bearing. In software program management, I had been doing it many years and pretty familiar with it.

But one thing that stands out in the second role, I feel I have more support from my managers and my directors. Although it’s a lonely role, I don’t feel alone. I feel their support and that is enough to take me to the moon.